Parenting in Today’s Age: Are We Truly Seeing Our Children?

There was a time when parenting meant giving the best education, providing food, shelter, and teaching values like respect, discipline, and gratitude. And while those things are still important, today’s children are growing up in a very different world—one we didn’t quite grow up in. And sometimes, that creates a gap. A gap not just in language or behavior, but in understanding.

Many parents tell me, “My child doesn’t talk to me like they used to.” Or “I feel like they live in a different world I don’t understand.”

And that’s true. They do.

Today’s children are growing up online. Their relationships, identities, validation—even their anxieties—often begin on a screen. Platforms like Instagram, Snapchat, or YouTube are not just entertainment—they’re entire universes where children are forming beliefs about themselves and the world.

If we as parents don’t know what’s happening in these spaces, we risk losing connection. We may assume they’re ‘addicted’ to screens or ‘too sensitive’, without realizing that those screens are often where they’re trying to belong, find identity, or express what they can’t say out loud.

The Parenting Shift We Need: From Control to Curiosity

We don’t need to be perfect parents. But we do need to be curious ones.

Instead of asking:

“Why are you always on your phone?”

Try asking:

“What are you watching these days?”

“What’s that creator you follow about?”

The shift here is subtle—but powerful. You’re no longer interrogating; you’re entering their world. And once children feel seen without being judged, they slowly open up.

How Do We Bridge the Gap?

1. Drop the need to ‘fix’ immediately

Often, when children come to us with something difficult, we jump into advice-giving mode. But what they might be needing is just presence—someone to sit with them in their mess without pushing solutions.

2. Stay updated

Watch the shows they’re watching. One such series I recommend is “Adolescence” on Netflix. It doesn’t just give you a peek into their world—it also helps you reflect on your own parenting lens. It’s a powerful reminder that children today are battling far more inner noise than we ever did.

3. Reflect, not react

When your child says something that triggers you—pause. Ask yourself: Is this about them, or is it touching an unresolved part of me?

Parenting often mirrors our own childhood wounds. The more aware we become of our inner child, the better we hold space for theirs.

4. Create tech boundaries, not punishments

Instead of banning screen time, co-create digital boundaries. Make it collaborative. Understand what they enjoy online and work with them to create balance.

5. See behavior as communication

That eye-roll, that door slam, that silent dinner—it’s not always rebellion. Sometimes, it’s a cry for connection in the only language they know. Try to decode the emotion beneath the behavior.

In Closing…

Parenting today is not about having all the answers. It’s about being willing to ask new questions.

The world your child lives in is fast, loud, and often overwhelming. If you can be their safe space—the one who tries to understand rather than fix—they’ll never forget that.

Because in the end, children don’t need perfect parents.

They need present ones.